Good Bad Decisions?


So we’ve all heard the adage “the best indicator of future choices is past decisions”, or something like that? I always thought it was just another thing people say as a scare tactic.. Like if you whack it too much you’ll go blind. But I’ve just come to realize that it’s sorta true. Not the whacking part mind you; it’s related to he most recent “situation” I’ve landed myself in. And it has to do with guys and the patterns we form for the “type” of guy we think we want.

Loosely speaking, I’ve always made questionable decisions when it came to guys and relationships. Not wreck-less.. Just questionable. Not falling for the traditional bad boy type if such a thing exists for us gays. No. More so for the guys with douchebag tendencies and a bit too much baggage who are more or less guaranteed to wreak havoc on my heart. And regardless of how many lessons I think I learn from said guys, it’s never enough to save me from picking from the same pile.

I see a mixture of tragic yet magical qualities that make it just the right amount of rational to believe that it just might work. Sounds like a lot of work but it happens so quickly that it feels effortless. I’m not of the belief that the reason for these not so great picks lay buried beneath some physiological issue.. Nah, it’s a pure passion for thrill and a challenge. If it works out, great- I’ve snagged me a good man of my making! If not, there’s usually lessons to be learnt with every failure- like emotional growth, so I take it as a win-win.

I’m sure I’m not the only one who trends on shifty blokes… Am I?




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