It being the first day of spring and all I figured a top 5 list might be in order. If you’re like me and haven’t focused on those self-affirming new years resolutions to be a better you, Spring’s your chance to step up, clear the clutter and do you.. Kicking these 5 things would probably help with that.
Self-doubt and Insecurities
I swear, the closer to 30 I get the more I’m cluing in to the fact that I’m the only hindrance to anything I think I can’t achieve. Super corny and superficial sounding but what else do insecurities and self doubt do except keep you from living life to the fullest?
Obsessing about finding love
I never really knew what looking for love meant really, just thought it was a phrase to be thrown around whenever. But after spending time “in search of love“- which for me was finding someone to ‘love me’– it just felt overtly forced. I mean, it’s a lot of pressure to put on yourself and some other person. And forced shit just never works- especially relationships. Spending less time obsessing about it and putting that time into setting mini goals and finding more things to love about myself opened me up to lots more opportunities to make a genuine connection with someone rather than force one. It’s a win-win: both you & your guy get the best version of you.
Cavorting with fake bitches
Fake friends are like cold sores, totally naturalizable but likely to resurface when you’re really conquering your shit and enjoying life. I ran into a friend (term used very loosely) recently after a gruelling yet extremely successful week. The first thing I was greeted with was, ‘girl you look tired!’ Followed by ‘book us a spa day and let’s catch up’ followed by all the always fabulous things he’d been up to. Mind you, this trick is unemployed and hasn’t really been doing much other than falsely checking into places on Facebook. Point is: nobody needs friends with selfish agendas who thrive off your failures and overlook your successes. Check em.
A hater’s vaguely similar to a fake bitch in the sense that their true agenda’s never really known. But where a fake bitch stops at temporary self gloat, the main goal of a hater is purposely to give you a hard fucking time and throw as many hurdles in your way to derail you from achieving your goals. Haters feed off the upheaval of shitty emotions that occur as a result of their douchey actions. In the words of Latrice: get up, look sickening and make them eat it! Never give a hater the pleasure of seeing you defeated. Hold your shit and push through the negativity. You’ll be better for it and they’ll have no choice but to keep it moving.
Putting stock in other people’s opinion
Just don’t. I truly believe that there’ll never be anyone who’ll innately know what’s better for you than you. I know how hard it could be to get to a level of self-acceptance where no fucks are given whether someone likes or hates you, finds your attractive or fugly or just thinks the very worse of you. By tailoring your life to the opinion of anyone else you deny yourself the most valuable feeling- self-value in knowing that you doing you the way you want to. So fuck the haters.